Bitter .... Party of 1 your table is now available.

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Yep that's right. Bitter. Which coincidentally rhymes with Shitter which is where my NON EXISTENT love life is at the moment. So what Bitter-fied me? Jan goes on her first date post divorce and the guy texted her after the date to tell her he had a good time and wants to see her again.

Now I LOVE Jan to death (even when we both leave the bathroom doors open while peeing and I can see her sitting on the pot, via the circa 1980 mirrored closet doors that she has in the bathroom!) But I have been on about, oh I don't know, A BAJILLION dates and .... NOTHING.

Cooties. It has to be cooties. I must have them and guys know it. Shit.

Guess it is time to get back to the bathroom mirror (no sickos ... not to watch Jan pee) but to practice "I am a precious treasure" over and over and over until hell - maybe I'll want to date myself.

Comments

  1. AliceDecember 16, 2008 at 12:51 PM

    gee, where did you ever come up with that phrase "bitter, party of one"? oh, wait you stole it from me.

    ReplyDelete
  2. LuckyDecember 19, 2008 at 2:02 PM

    HELL YEAH I stole it from you. But I am older so technically I was on the Earth first therefore anything witty, clever and generally funny that you come up with really belongs to me. However, anything stupid, dorky or generally poop-monger clearly is all on your own and the above "earth first" theory does not apply.

    ReplyDelete
  3. AliceDecember 20, 2008 at 2:22 PM

    I guess it evens out because I stole your dog!

    ReplyDelete

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